


An Apple a Day

by Peacockery



Category: Cuphead (Video Game)
Genre: Beppi being a dork, Clowns, Doctor/Patient, Drabble, Oneshot, Phobias, Protect the Clown, Shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-25
Updated: 2018-04-25
Packaged: 2019-04-27 15:50:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14428947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peacockery/pseuds/Peacockery
Summary: What if clowns were afraid of doctors, in the same way many children are afraid of clowns?Beppi doesn't like medical exams.





	An Apple a Day

**Author's Note:**

> Written in an attempt to break out of some fits of anxiety I have been having lately that have been preventing me from focusing on making other updates or putting out other ideas and requests. Slightly less goofball and fluffy like I normally do with Beppi, but it really helped. 
> 
> This is an extremely short quickie piece, but I am more than curious to continue writing this to see the aftermath, if anyone is interested.

The room was so stiflingly boring.

Blinding white porcelain tops upon humbled oak wood and frosted iron pipes were what he strained to focus on as the cuckoo clock ticked and rattled on the wall above him. If he tilted his head in such a precise way and squinted his eyes just right, Beppi swore he could distract himself enough to catch his reflection in the sheen of the sink.

His ass felt so unforgivingly cold upon the examination table where he had been told to perch. A glance down would be an uncomfortable reminder that his precious suit was not going to keep him safe today; the blue spots on the medical down would soon start dancing in his vision.

Indeed, the room itself felt suffocating. Too white, too thick with sterile nothingness, and as silent as the grave. He hated it. It was nothing like the colors and smells and noises he was straining so hard to remember. His heart was racing ten beats faster than the lazy swings of the clock’s pendulum, scalding the blood pounding through his body which made his cheeks burn and his fingers turn to numbed ice. His hands were almost matching the white of the counters in their death grip around the rims of the table.

Medical checkups were hell.

The cup kids had already been treated by the resident torturer of the Inkwell Isles...who in reality was a saccharine old man who just so happened to have a Red Delicious in place of a human noggin. Doctor Irwin Crisper had practiced medicine in these parts for ages...at least since Beppi had once been a small child and very much unclownlike back in the day. Still had that same twinkle in his eyes too, and that determined sprout of leaves for a mustache still persisted(even if they did look more wrinkled and rigid in his golden years). The old man was outside in the living room of his private practice, consulting with his old friend Kettle while the lads compared bandages and one-upped each other over which vaccination hurt the most.

Beppi’s vision ran blurry for a moment. The thought of those terrible, hellish needles jabbing into his skin like malicious wasps made his stomach crash into the pit of his belly. Once he was out of this terrible, horrible place...Djimmi was going to wish he had never been conjured.

A creak on the floorboards outside the door roused the clown, bristling him up and forcing him to grip his seat on the table even tighter while he leaned back. Even without the goofy puffiness of his suit obscuring him, Beppi no doubt looked ridiculous in the moment. From the shoulders down, his body was void of the stark divide of hexxed paint. But even with his gut running on a fine diet of popcorn and soda pop there was a hidden layer of muscle hiding beneath a lean form and the slight pudge of his belly. A wallop was ready to crack if that big headed executioner dared to come back in here…

He waited again to hear something, anything. Nothing but the faint chuckles of old men nattering and thumping pitter-patter of young feet stamping around...slowly, the clown unwound from his tense poise. The tick-tocking of the heavy pendulum returned to his ears as his heart began to slow down to match. Safe...for now, he was safe.

Antsy and bothered, he shifted again. This was ridiculous, but not as humiliating as sitting here in this unassuming prison in a light sheet and his underwear. He was as fit as a horse! Djimmi sure looked impressed by the amount of kicking and hissing he had been given while trying to pry his friend off of his carousel pony in order to come to this place. Why would a genie even give two knocks on whether or not he was in peak mortal health? Weirdo.

Not even Bon Bon’s rolling of the eyes and a threat to kiss his teeth with her fist had been as embarrassing as he felt now, naked along his fingers and so utterly exposed. Like a lion without his mane...like a peacock without his plumes…

Were they still out there?...

Perking up, Beppi strained himself to catch their physiques through the mottled glass centered in the doc’s door. For a moment, he snapped his eyes back to the pane itself to try and read the backwards print zig-zagged through the textured yellow cracks. Exa...min...a…

His spine nearly locked cold with fear as he heard the door knob jiggling for a moment. He tightened his pupils to dangerous little points while pushing his body up and back into a visage similar to a cornered cat. Swimming under the rippling sag of the gown was a body locked and ready to make a leap of faith the moment that door opened...Beppi almost felt nauseated from the heat suddenly pulling itself out of his fluttering stomach to pool between his ears. The room started to blur and melt again before his eyes…

The handle turned. A frantic gurgle of a whine escaped him as fresh light sliced into the floor and arced its way up the boring oak cabinets and white sterile counters. It grew and soaked into the opposite end of the room until the shadow of the big man himself began to eat it all up. The clown heaved, remaining resolute in his crouch despite the heavy shaking in his limbs. 

There the nightmare loomed, holding his book of curses and donning an equally terrible robe of crisp white nothingness. From just under the doctor’s armpit, Beppi could see them there; Djimmi had lowered his newspaper to blink stupidly, surprised eyes turning with revelation. Bon Bon didn’t look impressed at first, but even she relented in frowning. It was perhaps the first time she had ever seen the clown so helpless and absolutely terrified.

Just as they both began to sit up, the doctor closed the door.

**Author's Note:**

> Check out my tumblr blog for more writing musings or if you just wanna pal around. :)
> 
> socks-on-parade.tumblr.com


End file.
